Why I fired my secretary Two weeks ago was my 56th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and probably have a present for me. As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday. I thought, well, that's wives for you, the children will remember. The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday". And I felt a little better that someone had remembered. I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go to Lunch, just you and me." I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. "Let's go!" We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out To a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such A beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not. "She said, "Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable". "Sure!" I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake -----followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday. And I just sat there ---- On the couch ---- Naked.
