Wanking Disasters

Discussion in 'Fun Stuff' started by heather, Jun 8, 2004.

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  1. heather

    heather Balder than Pike!

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    Wanking Disasters

    bored and looking threw www.b3ta.com

    came across this thread, so funi.

    wanking disasters

    my fav so far is:

    im not sure if this is the kinda board that wud share those kinda of stories but if u have one about sum1 else....:)
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  3. spud693

    spud693 Registered User

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    ive been reading that thread... fucking awesome.

    i have a story (and no it's not me :rolleyes: )

    we went on a camping trip thing in a caravan, and it was a HOOOOOOOOOJ caravan with loads of rooms, beds / bunks etc, so there were a canny few people in there.

    and i swear - one lad would spend pretty much all night in his bunk polishing the rocket... at least 6 times a night, one night we counted up to like 15 times. i was both astonished and disgusted at this feat of hairy palmed hand lust.

    we also never noticed any toilet rolls around this kid's bunk - the sleeping bag must have been like a giant concrete sock by the end of the trip. :spangled: :sick:

    i dont know what became of this guy... i imagine porn would have been a natural career route :p
  4. d4rud3

    d4rud3 Registered User

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    :lol: :lol: Oh dear
  5. Miss T

    Miss T Registered User

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    class!
  6. GeordieLee

    GeordieLee Registered User

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    Semen is such a persistant stain.
  7. Mel B

    Mel B Newcastle Brown Stand.

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    Re: Wanking Disasters



    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Well done fella.
  8. Mel B

    Mel B Newcastle Brown Stand.

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    :lol: :lol: :lol: Fuck off, that's you Spudd matey.
  9. blur

    blur Registered User

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    this one is quite comical:

    "*Sob*
    I'm crying with the shame of this story...

    One day when I was a nipper I was going through my most furious fist and the furious stage (a billion times a day or something). Well anyway I had a thing for Jet from Gladiators (the shame)and had recorded the previous nights episode on my massive video. Anyway while watching it Jet was about to do her speciality - the over head rings thing - and I defy any man to not find that a turn on! Feeling randy I watched her lift her right leg really high in the air! Being well turned on I paused the video and proceeded to thrash one out.
    So I had my trousers round my ankles and was stood in front of the TV, well into the vinegar strokes when my door swung open and there was my Dad!!!! Shit! As I was facing the door there was no way he couldn't tell what I was doing! Within the same second our extremely excitable dog barged into the room and jumped up at me at the very same time my purple monster spurted my man milk! The dog got it full in the face and I fell backwards onto the bed, cock in hand!
    My Dad was bright red and tried to chase the dog out of the room while I started crying and tried to hide my shame! Burying my face in the pillow I really really wanted to die....
    then out of the quiet and my muffled sobs I heard my Dad say "I prefer Lightning to that Jet" then he closed the door!
    Sometime later I ventured downstairs and into the kitchen fearing laughs and ridicule only to be greeted with the sight of my Dad washing the Dog out in the yard!!!!!

    Dad I salute you!"
  10. Basic Instinct

    Basic Instinct Registered User

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    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
  11. loopyloosy

    loopyloosy Registered User

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    brilliant blur.
  12. SeniorChem Si

    SeniorChem Si Registered User

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    thought you would have kept well away from this thread Lucy, what with that egg/settee story I could tell ;)
  13. Mel B

    Mel B Newcastle Brown Stand.

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    :lol:
  14. blur

    blur Registered User

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    that was taken off the b3ta website, its not a personal account :eek:
  15. loopyloosy

    loopyloosy Registered User

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    lol i hope not like!!!!!!:lol:
  16. Guest

    id have gave jet it tbf

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