Sex Nightmares NIGHTMARE #1 >>After a long night of making love, the young guy rolled over, >>pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter. >>Unable to find it, he asked the girl if she had one at hand. "There >>might be some matches in the top drawer," she replied. He opened >>the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting >>neatly on top of a framed picture of another man. naturally, the >>guy began to worry. "Is this your husband?" he inquired nervously. >>"No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend >>then?" he asked. "No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his >>ear. "Well, who is he then?" demanded the bewildered guy. Calmly, >>the girl replied, "That's me before the operation." >> NIGHTMARE #2 The spark had been lost in this guy's marriage, so he was trying to >>think of a way to rekindle it. One night he came from work, and >>found his wife asleep in bed. He thought to himself, "what should I >>do?" "Oh-I know." He proceeded to get under the covers and go down >>on his wife. Soon she began to gently squirm and moan in pleasure. >>After a few minutes, her body spasmed with ecstasy as she climaxed. >>Afterwards, the man went straight to the bathroom to brush his >>teeth. When he got there, the light was on and he saw his wife >>there shaving her legs. He exclaimed, "What are you doing in >>here?!?" She said, "Shhhh!," pointing at the bed, "You'll wake your >>mother" >> >>NIGHTMARE #3 One night a guy takes his girlfriend home. As they are about to >>kiss each other goodnight at the front door, the guy starts feeling >>a little horny. With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand >>against the wall and smiling, he says to her, "Honey, would you >>give me a blow job?" Horrified, she replies, "Are you mad? My >>parents will see us!" "Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this >>hour?" He asks grinning at her. "No, please. Can you imagine if we >>get caught?" "Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all >>sleeping!" "No way. It's just too risky!" "Oh please, please, I >>love you so much?!?" "No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just >>can't!" "Oh yes you can. Please?" Out of the blue, the light on the >>stairs goes on, and the girl's sister shows up in her pajamas, hair >>disheveled, and in a sleepy voice she says, "Dad says to go ahead >>and give him a blow job, or I can do it. Or if need be, mom says >>she can come down herself and do it But for God's sake tell him to >>take his hand off the intercom!"
I've got that last one as a mastercard advert on my pc... part of the "priceless, for everything else there's mastercard" campaign... its mint
