pope > On a tour of England, the Pope took a couple of days off to visit the > Lancashire coast. His 4x4 Pope-Mobile was driving along the golden sands > when there was an enormous commotion. They rushed to see what it was and > upon approaching the scene the Pope noticed just outside the surf, a hapless > man wearing a French football jersey, struggling frantically to free himself > from the jaws of a 20 foot shark! > > At that moment a speedboat containing three men wearing England tops roared > into view. Spontaneously, one of the men took aim at the shark and fired a > harpoon into its ribs, immobilising it instantly. The other two reached out > and pulled the French fan from the water and then, using long clubs, beat > the shark to death. They bundled the bleeding, semi-conscious man into the > speedboat along with the dead shark and prepared for a hasty retreat, when > they heard frantic calling from the shore. > > It was the Pope, summoning them to the beach. Upon reaching land, the Pope > went into raptures about the rescue and said "I give you my blessing for > your brave actions. I'd heard there were racist, xenophobic people trying to > divide the people of Europe but now I have seen with my own eyes this is not > true. I can see your society is a truly enlightened example of tribal > harmony which could serve as a model for other nations." > > He blessed them all and drove off. > > As he departed, the harpoonist asked the others, "Who was that?!" > > "That," one answered, "was his Holiness the Pope. He is in direct contact > with God and has access to all God's wisdom." > > "Well," the harpoonist replied, "he knows naff all about shark fishing. > How's the bait holding up or do we need to get another one?"
