Funny Shit Some funny shit, some old shit. According to a news report, a certain private school in Edinburgh recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night, the janitor would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back. Finally the headmistress decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the janitor. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the janitor who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the janitor to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirrors. There are teachers, and then there are educators. ********** A blonde bird pushes her Pinto into a gas station. She tells the mechanic, "It died." After he works on it for a few minutes, it's idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburettor." She says, "How often do I have to do that?" ********** A 7 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?", says the 7 year old, "I think it's about time we started swearing." The 4 year old nods his head in approval. "When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'll swear first, then you swear after me, OK?" The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm. The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 7 year old what he wants for breakfast. "Oh, sh*t mum, I guess I'll have some Coco Pops". WHACK!! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out. She looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do you want for breakfast, young man?!" "I don't know," he blubbers, "but you can bet your f***ing life it won't be Coco Pops" ********** And finally, you gotta love a good beer ...The latest Becks Beer advert in Scotland (displayed in pubs) is as follows: 'YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE POSH TO SWALLOW BECKS'
