Fucking thursday Yes that time again i'm off my box! stayed south of the tyne most of the day this week somehow, had the urge to stay north but i'm a lazy cunt and sat in the garden all day. well not all day, been to town and went to the shop first thing for drink and tabs, 16 bottles and 20 lambert, managed to run out of both by 11.15pm. Before i started on them though i was down on the quayside this afternoon, lloyds to be exact. A couple of weeks ago i was grafting and i come across a note in a window with a phone number on. It was specifically addressed (the postman)to me and it was from a bird, could tell by the tone she was gagging for it. Anyways i thought it was a piss take at first, took the number down and thought nothing of it. Then a few days later i get pulled by a bird on the same estate(yes its bensham but there are some decent and honourable people who live there) saying "why haven't you got in touch with my mate?" I told her i thought it was wind up and just got on with everyday life. She told me her mate was offended and thought i didn't fancy her. Hang on a minute, i've never seen the lass so how can i fancy her or not? Anyways i thought i'd do the honourable thing, saying everytime i go past the house i hear a fucking wolf whistle everyday, the blinds are all closed and its mad as fuck if you ask me, who the fuck whistles out of windows man? Well i got in touch and met her this afternoon. Let me tell you, proper MILF, ching fucking ching. Had a a nice sup and a bit chat, could meet again, might not. Actually i'll be round hers tommorrow with something in my sack, hopefully it will fit in her letterbox. I mentioned a court order last week, well what a fucking nightmare man! Arranged for the law enforcement officer to come to mine and pick the money up on friday morning at 11, i woke up still off my bracket but had to get to the cash point to withdraw some coin to pay the fine. The fine was for (allegedly) pissing all over vivien westwoods window in newcastle sometime last year(can't remember that at all), nez might be able to but i very much doubt it. Never paid the fine apparently so owed over £100 or i would be locked up there and then, jesus pissing is natural fucking stabbing isn't. Well i eventually got to the cash point and low and behold my card wouldn't work. "There is a problem with your card, please contact your bank" shit! went to the next machine, same carry on, bollocks. My card is totally battered off the abuse it has taken since new year( no prizes for guessing what from) Walked home, made a deal with my mam she'd give me a cheque i'd give her the coin. Bloke turns up, "sorry we don't do cheques". Fuck. Told him to come back at 2. Get the money from bank, have an hours kip,he turns up, pay and sign then the cunt comes out with: "I bet that's the most expensive piss you will have" fuck you twat. couple hours kip, off to shindig Techno tits. Been listening to it all day, think the words are "fucking hooked". Had to break it up though with some of The who as the elders were complaining. "what is this shite?" "this shite, i have you no, is funk" Good craic though, always is when your trying to explain the finer points of modern dance music. Sun's been beaming down all day, shear upper class and unalduterated hedonism in leam lane like. Too many grolsch though got work in a few hours, love it man! looking forward to the weekend, who isn't? get the tequila's in. Rights!
