Dogs & Cats Excerpts from a Dog's Daily Diary: >> >> 8:00 am - Dog food! My favourite thing! >> 9:30 am - A car ride! My favourite thing! >> 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favourite thing! >>10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing! >>12:00 pm - Lunch! My favourite thing! >> 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favourite thing! >> 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favourite thing! >> 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favourite thing! >> 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favourite thing! >> 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favourite thing! >>11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing! >> >>Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary: >> >> Day 683 of my captivity: >> My captors continue to taunt me with biz are little dangling objects. >> They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed >> hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the >> rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to >> keep up my strength. >> The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt >> to disgust them, I once again vomit on the floor. >> Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their >> feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it >> clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made >> Condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. The >> Audacity! >> There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was >> Placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However r, I >> could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement >> was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and >> How to use it to my advantage. >> Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my >> Tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this >> again tomorrow - but at the top of the stairs. >> I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. >> The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems >> to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded! >> The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with >> the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My >> Captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so >> he is safe .... for now
