bash.org quotes (again)

bash.org quotes (again)

IRC scares the shit out of me

Primus521: im at walmart and this chick is buying a box of tampons and they are missing the upc and wont ring up
Primus521: so the cashier tells his buddy to get a price check on tampax
Primus521: the dude looks at him and says, "the kind u push in, or the kind you hammer in?"
Primus521: lol
Primus521: turns out he misheard him
Primus521: he thought he said thumbtacs
Primus521: you should have seen the look on the chicks face
Primus521: omfg
Primus521: til the day i die
Primus521: i will never forget it

<Eticam> I was in biology class once, and the teacher said there was sugar in sperm
<Eticam> And a girl asked why doesn't it taste sweet then
<Eticam> When she realised what she said her face became red like a spanked monkey ass
<Eticam> Then the teacher said, because you taste sweetness with the front of your tongue, not the part of your tongue back in your throat
<Eticam> The girl started crying and left class ^^

<TXTerron> wanna know whats geeky?
<Jennifer> hmm?
<TXTerron> I'm driving down the road
<Jennifer> I drove down the road today too...
<Jennifer> Wait, You mean you're on irc in your truck?
<TXTerron> yeah, using my wireless card
<Jennifer> ^___^
<Jennifer> Jason, is that safe?
<TXTerron> na, i just type with one hand while I'm driving and halfway watch the road, its cool, dont worry
<Jennifer> You're good with typing with one hand?
<TXTerron> shaddup
<TXTerron> FUCK
<TXTerron> i just rear ended a lady
<TXTerron> brb

<QJ> your grandma opened the shower door
<QJ> while you were wanking?
<knox> yep
<knox> it was worse than that
<QJ> she finished you off?

Re: bash.org quotes (again)

t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us when i say...
BlackAdder> WRONG BTICH
BlackAdder> IM SICK OF YOU
BlackAdder> AND YOUR LAME STORIES
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE THINKS YOURE FUNNY
BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR STORIES
BlackAdder> IN FACT
BlackAdder> IF YOU DIED RIGHT NOW
BlackAdder> I DON"T THINK NOBODY WOULD CARE
BlackAdder> SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT FAG
*** t0rbad sets mode: +b BlackAdder*!*@*.*
*** BlackAdder has been kicked my t0rbad ( )
t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right
CRCError> right
heartless> Right.
r3v> right

<Raven> I tried setting my hotmail password to penis.
<Raven> It said my password wasn't long enough.

<+darthpony> geez dude
<+darthpony> with my last gf
<+darthpony> I made the most terrible fruedian slip
<+darthpony> we were sitting at breakfast the one day, and I wanted to ask her "pass the sugar please"
<+darthpony> instead I said "you're ruining my life, you fucking bitch"

<Fulgore> whats the complement to a 43 degree angle?
<sparks> My you're looking "acute" today
<Fulgore> fuck you

[ron`] Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll fuck you with a rake

<Meph|st0> Complaint : BOUGTH IT FOR MY COUSIN WHO HAD CANCER, ITEM NEVER ARRIVED AND MY COUSIN DIED
<Meph|st0> thats the greatest ebay feedback i have ever seen

<tumult> well that was like the coolest class period i've ever had
<lasombra> tumult ?
<tumult> this kid asks me for a dollar so he can get something from a vending machine
<tumult> i tell him i don't have one (truth)
<tumult> he says bullshit
<tumult> i tell him to fuck off
<tumult> he stands up and punches me in the face three times
<tumult> sits back down
<tumult> teacher doesn't notice/care
<tumult> so blood is pouring out onto my desk
<tumult> from my lip
<tumult> i turn to the girl next to me and say
<tumult> "hey, can i use one of the tissues jammed into your bra?"
<zyko^> what did she do?
<tumult> punched me in the face

<@Gandalf> Recent scientific study found that the kind of male face a woman finds attractive can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle.
<@Gandalf> For instance, if she is ovulating she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.
<@Gandalf> And if she is menstruating, she is likely to prefer a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors shoved deep into his temple and a cricket stump jammed up his arse

<tatclass> YOU ALL SUCK DICK
<tatclass> er.
<tatclass> hi.
<andy\code> A common typo.
<tatclass> the keys are like right next to each other.

* ab is away - gone, if anyone talks in the next 25 minutes as me it's bm
being an asshole -
<ab> HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS

<ohm> damn
<ohm> FUCK
<ohm> DAMN
<ohm> i was just in an AIM convo with a chick, and my grandmother's window pops up
<ohm> FUCK
<ohm> i go like this to her
<ohm> "i want to suck on your clit"
<ohm> FUCK

<Beeth> Girls are like internet domain names, the ones I like are already taken.
<honx> well, you can stil get one from a strange country :-P
<ckx> women ask for it
<ckx> they act all old and mature
<ckx> and then you stick your cock up their ass
<ckx> and they get all bitchy
<ckx> "I"M ONLY 13, I'M ONLY 13!!!"

<calin> we had a guy at school that wore black lipstick.. and was all gothy.. and then one day we caught him buying an assvibrator
<ecoli> ew.
<ecoli> wait, you "caught" him?
<ecoli> like, you were behind him in line at the assvibrator store?
<Aero> he doesnt answer
*** Quits: calin (No route to host)

<NES> lol
<NES> I download something from Napster
<NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done
<NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"
<NES> "getting my song back fucker"

<anamexis> oh man
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick fuckers)
<anamexis> :<