an irishman, a scotsman & a scouser... An Irishman, an Australian and a Scouser are in a bar on Christmas day. They notice a dishevelled man with a long beard drinking on his own at a table in the corner. He seems very familiar, but they are unable to remember who he is. They stare and stare, until suddenly the Irishman twigs: "My God, it's Jesus!" Sure enough, it is Jesus, a little worse for wear and nursing a pint. Thrilled, the Irishman sends him over a pint of Guinness, the Australian sends over a pint of Fosters and the Scouser sends over a pint of bitter. Jesus accepts the drinks, smiles over at the three men, and after raising the pints aloft, downs them quickly, one after another. Jesus approaches the trio. He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement: "My God! The arthritis I've had for 30 years is gone. It's a miracle!" Jesus then shakes the Aussie's hand, thanking him for the lager. As he lets go, the man's eyes widen in shock: "Strewth mate, the bad back I've had all my life is cured! It's a miracle." Jesus then approaches the Scouser who pulls away in horror: "Back off, mate, I'm on disability benefit
